FITNESS XceL

Can you learn from a broken car horn? I can!

On a recent camping trip, I experienced a valuable life lesson. One beautiful, clear morning, my family and I were sitting at our picnic table enjoying a peaceful breakfast—until a horn started honking.  

We looked around in annoyance for the perpetrator; the offending vehicle turned out to be a truck with a broken horn system. The driver of the truck was slowly making his way out of the campground, but every time the truck moved forward, the horn would start honking. He would start moving forward, the horn would start honking; he would stop, the horn would stop. After a few stops and starts, he finally gave in and just drove slowly forward and out of the campground. The honking sound faded as he got farther away.  Five minutes later, the sound was completely gone and our peaceful morning resumed.

Once I had realized the source of the honking, and recognized the predicament of the poor truck driver, my brief annoyance turned immediately into sympathy—I too had been stuck in a car with a horn that wouldn’t stop honking. Some time ago in my old Karmengia, the horn decided to start honking every time I turned the wheel. Another time in my C.R.V. the alarm system, which sounded the horn, would go off every time I turned the car on. And then there was my “Bug” with the horn that honked uncontrollably every time I opened the door; consequently, I had to climb in and out of the windows to get in or out without honking.

I know what it feels like to be stuck in a car with a honking horn. At best, people stare and make faces at you; at worst, people swear, yell obscenities, or gesture rudely. It’s not a comfortable or pleasant situation to be in. Add to that the hassle any car problem brings with it: the repair cost; the time without a car and the time spent
dealing with the repair. Yes, I had genuine sympathy and empathy for the guy in the truck.

As I noticed my own change in feelings toward the guy in the honking truck, from annoyance to sympathy, and I noticed how being annoyed took away from my beautiful morning with my family, yet feeling sympathy had added to my beautiful morning with my family, I realized I had just experienced a valuable life lesson.

Think of the guy with the honking horn as one of those people in your life whose interactions with you and the world are a constant source of irritation. Simplistically speaking, we have two options on how to respond to this
person:  one is to be annoyed, frustrated, angry—you name it, but it’s a negative feeling and it pits you against the person, ruins your moment and prevents you from learning; the other, and healthier option, is to feel empathy or sympathy for the person and to leave your heart open, and be willing to assist if asked.

Remember, this person with their honking horn, whether they know it or not, is drawing the full gamut of negative attention towards them. THEY have to live with themselves. THEY can’t get away from the
honking and the subsequent consequences. You can. So, be gracious; their predicament is far worse than yours!

But there is more to this story…

The second part of the story happened two days ago, about a week after the first part. Literally within hours of writing the camping story down as a draft for my blog, I was in my car alone returning home. I pulled into my condo’s community garage, which is open to the outside and within easy hearing distance of the condos, and I turned off my car. I tried to get out. The door was locked (it locks automatically when I start driving, but doesn’t unlock automatically when I turn the car off).

Outside was very dark and I couldn’t see anything. I fumbled for the unlock button and pushed it—nothing happened. I tried again—nothing. So, I manually unlocked the door and opened it—HONK! HONK! HONK!  The alarm system had activated—I couldn’t believe it! I closed the door and put the key in the ignition—no change. I turned the car engine over—no joy. I put the car in reverse and backed out—still honking—and it’s 10:30 at night! The close confines of the garage magnified the sound so I was sure I would wake people up!

I alternated between laughing and swearing as I desperately tried everything I could think of to make the honking stop. I sped forward—nope. I sped backward—nope. I opened and closed the door then turned the car off and on again—nothing. I backed into my parking spot (I’m not sure why I did that), swore a little more, took a deep breath, and stopped. I knew there had to be a way to stop the honking, so I decided to just sit there calmly until I worked out what it was. At last, it came to me—I needed to use the automatic button on my key chain! Voilà!  It worked. The night was peaceful once again.  

I started laughing! How perfect was that—to happen right after I had written this story down? I then realized that when I’d watched that truck go honking through the campground, I had missed two more important lessons:

1. There are times when that person with the irritating horn may be me! I may be the one creating disruption, frustration and annoyance in other people’s lives. Remembering this will help me be more aware of my interactions with others and will also allow me to open my heart even further, and more humbly, to those around me.

2.  The person with the “honking horn” may be desperately trying to change or fix the problem and yet have no idea how. Remembering that will encourage me to offer assistance if required, without judgment, and with
an open and caring heart when needed.

This “honking horn” episode was a small incident which evolved into a big learning experience for me. I am always looking for, and finding, ways to learn from what happens around me because truly, there are no accidents. Everything happens for a reason and each event has a role in the creation of who I am and what my life is.

Try that way of being and that kind of awareness for a little while if you don’t already—it’s pretty cool!